Office Toilet Shenanigan

WARNING: If you do not find bowel and toilet related jokes funny, please kindly be advised not to read this blog post as it may cause nausea or dizziness.

It's been a couple of months since I started a full-time job working out of an office in Bangkok.  I have noticed quite a few things that are rather odd about the look of the place.  But what's more interesting are my fellow employees' going-to-the-bathroom behavior. I'm not saying that everybody does this at the office and I'm not trying to point fingers at anyone.  I just want to share my personal experiences out there in the open.


Here is a list of:

 3 EXTREMELY WEIRD THINGS PEOPLE BRING INTO OFFICE TOILET STALLS

1. Mamy Poko Wipes AKA Wetones AKA Wet Tissue AKA Baby Ass Wiping Tissue

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First day of work I noticed this guy who was walking with a pack of baby wipes and wondered where he was going with it.  He wasn't hiding it or anything but then he went into the mens room. I couldn't figure out why until I realized that its because my office bathroom is toilet-shower-head-free. (meaning that there isn't a ที่ฉีดก้น. And for those of you who don't read Thai, it means the hose with a gun next to an asian toilet  used for the purpose of washing our private parts when we finish doing our business) 

Later I've noticed that it wasn't just him.  Several people at the office has these wet wipe packs on their desks. I've noticed that a lot of people struggle with just "wiping it dry" with the tissue paper, something that I've never really thought of as an issue but anyways interesting. Their solution to not having an "ass hoes" gets pretty creative with the next item on the list.

2. Cups

Nope, the cups ain't for teeth brushing or mouth washing. Have a guess at what this is used for...

Correct! It is used to carry the water from the sink into the bathroom stalls! And whats next? You guessed it, washing your poop off of your a-hole. I really have no comment for this but really has to give kudos to those who has taken the step extra to deal with the toilet-shower-head free bathroom situation.

Just to add, when you use the toilet after these people, the floor is practically like songkran where water was everywhere and the floors get all dark and shit because people step over it.  I don't understand why the water would run down on the floor instead of down the toilet bowl, perhaps the cups spills while people are taking off their pants? :/

3. Smartphones 

I get it when you bring your phone or your iPad into the bathroom at home when u go and take a dump.  But seriously, this is the office- I don't think that its very appropriate for you to sneak in the bathroom to avoid getting caught playing LINE: Cookie Run.  And if you were going play it in the bathroom, please silence your phone.  I would really prefer not to hear the jelly collecting tones when I take MY shit in the morning.

The list extends but they're not as crazy as mentioned above.  I will write more as I have more clever ways to talk about them.

Have a nice week everybody.

Mucha Love,

Nicha